So I had peopled all day on Saturday, and I came home and talked to Sierra and Hannah for a minute, and I looked at my stories, including the one for NaNo, and...I hated them. I didn't just think they were boring, I hated them. The only one I didn't hate was the one I was doing for OYAN.
These stories were boring. The characters were boring. No one would ever want to read them. Why couldn't I write stories like the ones Hannah, Sierra, and I write? Our characters interact so well, why can't mine?
I ended up telling them I was going to trash all of them. Of course they reacted as any amazing writing buddies would:
Sierra: RACHAEL NO DON'T TRASH THE STORIES
Hannah: PUT THEM ON A SHELF DON'T TRASH THEM
Sierra: IT'S TEN O'CLOCK AND YOU'VE PEOPLE TODAY, DON'T MAKE DESCITIONS!"
Somehow they convinced me not to trash the stories that night, and the morning!!!!
I was sick.
So I stayed home from church, listened to a sermon and worship music, and plotted. I mixed two stories, Fire N' Gold and Red King together, which worked out beautifully because Catus from Red King has horrible nightmares and is insane, and Emmy from Fire N' Gold manipulates dreams and then her own mess up and she starts going crazy too.
I was able to love a few of them and not trash them, but tragically, some are gone. Hazard, Renegade, all of the Flicker sequels. *sniffs* But the good news is, I have what I'm going to do for NaNo now.
It was going to be the second book in my Superheroes series (don't ask why the first, third, and fourth are written...), but then I decided to do my other two.
I am here to tell you something:
You are a good writer.
We might not always feel like it, but that's normal. Thank goodness my fabulous friends kept me from trashing my stories, because I would have regretted that deeply.
We're all going to feel like a bad writer sometimes, I was just unlucky in feeling that way right before NaNo. There are many posts I could point you to if you still feel like this, but one I loved was Hannah's post.
Thank you so much for reading!
Do you ever get the downs? How do you deal with them? What's your favorite post about downs?